Thursday, March 3, 2011

Questions answered as requested.(short and sweet)

I was at Borders book shop looking for a book that would help me with my grief and give me answers. I asked in my head, "Come on David please let a book jump off the shelf  to let me know you are here." At that moment a young boy ran past the shelf at the end of the aisle.With a "Woops'" he knocked off one of the books. I had to look at it. It was Guiness World Records. Now David was not a reader but every year he asked for the newest edition of "The Guinness Book of Records." I think my question was answered

Before losing David I used to go walking each day with a group of friends. Well their visits became more sporadic after the event. Guess I wasn't much fun to be around anymore. It was my birthday and I was feeling pretty miserable. My friends had always taken me out for lunch but I hadn't heard from any of them for over 6 months. I said to my husband ,"Guess I'll be spending my birthday by myself." That moment the phone rang and guess who??   I had a lovely lunch with my old friends.

As David's death was deemed a homicide we were put in touch with the HVSG- Homicide Victims Support Group N.S.W, formed by Anita Cobby's  and Emily Simpsons parents, ( two of the most horrific murders in Australia) to help people that had lost a loved one due to homicide. In 2006 another family in a neighbouring suburb had lost their son to murder. He was the same age as David and his name was James. I asked the HVSG  group if they could get in touch with James mother and ask if she could talk to me. She rang me soon after and came over for coffee and spent 5 hours with us. She and her family are wonderful people and we have since become firm friends. On that first meeting just after she had left I asked my husband," I wonder if David has met up with James in Heaven.'I walked past the T.V and "King of Queens," was playing. I stopped to watch a bit. At that moment the character played by Jerry Stiller was saying," I really enjoy the company of Mr Palmer." Guess what James last name is?

Right on time.

I had the feeling that I wanted to watch the old T.V series,"Sliders," with the actor Jerry O'Connell. I had always loved science fiction and the possibility of parallel universes was intriqueing, especially now. I went to the shops and looked for the series. I found it but it was over $50 so decided that was too much to pay for a series I knew little about. I let the idea slip from my mind until a few weeks later when I was at JB hifi with my younger son. It was only $25 so I bought it. I was ready to watch the first series in anticipation but wanted a partner to share it with. I asked my younger son if he would watch it with me. He wasn't in the mood so I shelved the idea for a few days.I asked again and younger son was ready to watch it with me. We settled down and tuned into episode one.
The main character played by Jerry O'Connell is a brainiac who has invented a sliding machine to explore parallel universes. Before he tries the machine out for the first time, Jerry's character records a video diary for his mum. In it he says something like this,"Today is 25th September, I love you mum. If I don't get back please don't throw out any of my stuff as I may make it back one day and don't worry about me as  wherever I am, I'm having a blast"
Guess what day we sat down to watch this episode.? Believe it or not 25TH SEPTEMBER. Go figure that one.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Cars and transfiguration

My husband had his car in for a service. He couldn't make it home from work in time so my younger son and I went to pick it up from the Ford Dealer.Now my husband had been a Holden man for a long time but David had told him to buy a Ford RX6 turbo next time he went to buy a car.David was mad about cars.
 A  co worker at my husbands work was being posted overseas. He had just purchased a RX6 Turbo and couldn't take it with him. It was in immaculate condition. He had been trying to sell it to no avail.Well guess what, Bill bought it.He felt like David had set this up.
My younger son and I were waiting in the Car dealers office for this car to be ready. In walked a young guy and sat down. I looked at him and couldn't believe my eyes. He was the spitting image of David. I couldn't take my eyes off him.Was I imagining it. Was it wishful thinking? As we were leaving I saw him front on. He didn't look like David at all, but in profile he could have been a clone of him. My younger son and I hadn't talked while in the office but as we left, I blurted out,"Did you see that?" He said,"You mean the man that looked just like David". I think David was there checking out the cars..

Disembodied voices.

It was the first year. I was looking for Christmas presents.Christmas wasn't really something I wanted to celebrate but I couldn't disappoint my nephews and nieces. No matter what had happened to me, their lives were still filled with the joy and  wonderment of the season. I found a  sound recorder on special and thought that may be nice for my nephew. My younger son loved sound recorders  and when I showed it to him he asked if he could have it. Being the softy I am, I said "Of Course." He had a great time that afternoon recording his voice. It was nice to see him smiling , if only for a while. To operate the sound recorder, you had to hold a button as you talked. To replay you pressed the play button.My son left the sound recorder in the kitchen over night. The next day he went to use it again and pressed the "play'" button to recall what he had recorded the day before. He said,"Mum ,Listen to this. It was David's voice and it said," I am David." Replaying it over and over again, there was no denying it. It WAS David's voice. The sound recorder has not been used since and the voice is still there when you press play.

I was getting dressed one day when I distinctly heard my name called. It was a man's voice and reminded me of my maternal grandfather. I asked my husband and son if they had called me and both denied it. The voice was not in my head and I really heard it. Soon after I went to see a medium and told her about it. She said,"You are realising that this world isn't real!"
Just this week I heard David's voice, calling his brother by name. The same tone, the same inflection. Again the voice was not in my head.

Encounters with the other side

We decided to purchase another plot at the cemetary and were there to finalise the arrangements. As we were leaving the lady we were talking to said, "By the way, David's plaque is on the grave." We had been waiting for it to be made. These words did not fill me with cheer. The plaque meant that it was true, David really had died and it was all real. As we left the office I said,to my husband and son,"I don't want to see the plaque." as the words left my mouth a large woosh of wind swept across my head. I was sure it was a bird swooping at me. With flailing arms I must have looked a sight. My husband and son were walking beside and behind me. They said, "What is wrong." I told them and they said," There is nothing there." The air was as still as it had been. Not a breeze or bird in sight. Was David trying to tell me to go and look at his plaque. I think so and so I did.

I was having lunch with some old school friends. Debbie my best friend during my school years had lost her husband when her son, now 22, was 6 months old. We were talking about our losses and how we missed our husband and son. Debbie told me that shortly after her husband died, she saw him standing over the baby's crib. It brought her much comfort. Debbie had a can of coke on the table, suddenly it started moving across the table to me. Debbie, Joanne and I watched in astonishment. When the can stopped we checked it. It wasn't wet. We checked the table and it wasn't tilting. All three of us saw it. We tried to repeat it but it just wouldn't move. Perhaps Alan or David were visiting.

My husband and I were returning home . As we walked to the door my husband exclaimed, "What was that?" I heard nothing. He said it sounded like a swarm of bees flying past his ear.It reminded me of an old "Star Trek," episode where Captain Kirk is put into a higher frequency by Aliens. When he tries to talk to the other members of the Enterprise all they hear is a buzzing noise. Was this David visiting and trying to communicate. I have read that when we ascend we are on a higher, faster frequency.I hope so.